This is my first mobile post. I guess we'll see how it goes. We are in route to Temecula, my stomach in knots. I'm so thankful for the company of Kevin's parents and our bloom, of course. We are making the trek from Phoenix. The miles in between are enough I hope, to let go of the anticipation.
I don't know what it feels like to go home, to where my mom once lived. Walking through the front door feels like the hardest step. To not be greeted by her hello, embrace or incessant giggles when she sees Chloe's face.
I told Kevin last night that I feel too young to be doing this. Going home to sort through my mom's belongings. Even though I'm thirty years old, I don't feel ready for this journey. I suppose you never are.
For now I'll enjoy the backseat view of the of the dry, brittle desert and clear blue sky.
If you are reading this, can you say a little prayer for me?
Monday, February 13, 2012
To provide our little bloom with more play area, Kevin made this 6'x4' Chalkboard. It's the perfect weekend DIY project. All you need is this chalkboard paint, primer and MDF board.
Cut the board to the size you'd like,
paint, allow time to dry and paint paint again.
Wait 72 hours,
then draw to your hearts content. Chloe uses her sidewalk chalk. It's just the right size for developing her fine motor skills. I'm itching to get some of these chalkboard markers.
Most mornings, after breakfast, we play on the patio. And repeat that in the afternoon.
Here is what she and Kevin drew the other day.
Kevin came up with this project for her all on his own. What a sweet dad!
Chloe went for her first haircut today. Her locks were getting wild but I was afraid that once her hair was cut her curls would be gone. To my delight it was the opposite, they bounced up even more than before.
When we got home, I chased her around the house to catch a few photos to remember the occasion. Then after attempting to get her to nap all afternoon, it just wasn't happening; I decided to let her play. I was checking some email and she came over crawled up on my lap and shortly fell asleep.
My hunny thought it was pretty cute to come home to and he snapped these of us. I was glued to my chair for about an hour. I was glad I had some organic vegetable soup in the pantry for dinner. It was one of those days.
Oh and I got my hair cut and colored last weekend. I was long over due. Yay, for fresh locks!
Sunday, February 5, 2012
I totally took for granted the green, grassy parks of California. I had no idea that parks didn't always include this green-soaked view. Well, Arizona parks are primarily dirt and the grass that is there-brown. The down the street is no different but, it does have these wispy gray-blue bushes, with yellow flowers, that are such eye-candy.
Desert landscape is a big change for us, considering our previous scenery boasted ocean views and rich green parks. I have to say Huntington Beach was our dream spot in so many ways. We did not take it for granted. We said daily, "I love it here!" Kevin and I both long for the ocean and we dream of (again) living somewhere where we can walk to most of our weekly activities. We are sure our future home will have at least one of these elements. In the meantime we are getting acclimated to cacti and finding new scenes to appreciate. I do love the dusty gray succulents and copper, steel sculpture that sprinkle the city.
We've had so many changes in the last 5 months. It's like we are finally catching our breath. Many days Kevin and I look at each other and say, "Where are we?" It's like in the midst of a storm we've plopped ourselves down in a foreign spot to call home. It will be nice to meet a few people to call friends but for the time being, I'm a little quiet and I'm okay with that. My heart needs a little extra protection these days. It's fragile.
I've been concerned that my heartache will effect our little bloom but I'm finding that if anything, she lifts it from me. She is a constant reminder that life is so SO beautiful, even amidst the ache of loss. She refocuses me on our family. That is a good thing. And I'm happy to report, our little bloom is flourishing. She has grown so much and is talking a ton. She loves reading, Olivia the piglet, her wooden puzzles, her favorite word "baby"-we hear it all day long. She blows kisses to nearly everyone, is excited to wave Hi! to new people and is quick to giggle. We feel so blessed to be her parents although, we are still often sleep deprived. I'm afraid to jinx it but this week-she slept until 6am nearly every day. That alone, is life-changing, bliss.
Right now we are exploring our new city, taking naps and trying so many new restaurants. My jeans are getting a bit tight. It's a good thing I found a pilates instructor. Chloe and I go walking often but It's that mid-week workout that is gonna keep me in check. Thank goodness.
We've also been lucky enough to have lots of visitors. (Photos coming soon) It is wonderful to have friends and family here with us, we feel very loved. Right now, my sweet little bro is with us. He is such a great uncle. We are so happy he is here.
Well, pretty random post. But, isn't that how life is?
So, here I am, just a girl, trying to find her balance.
How do you find yours? Any tips?